dawn

and Ma is alone and drinking herself to death , and using codependent tactics to keep a source around…

Someone to care,thus validating her very existence…

But hey…

I hold down a job.

And that’s all the tax Man cares about.

And cult level Pentecostals played a huge childhood role..

With my cousins Josh and Adam, my only friend…

And when their mom died,, everything shifted..

(you’ve seen some things..)

I really have.. not trying to sound like anything meaningful,

I mean it.

I really have seen crazy things.

Humans behaving in the most bizarre ways..

And we were in an isolation pod … Being homeschooled.. Christian curriculum, no evil outside influences.

No secular music, media, anything.

No comics.

Nothing that had “magic” in it, because that was satanic….

Yep..

Yeah…

And now I am the age I am..

And I’m looking around..

Drink it in… Take a deep pull from it all …

Yeah…

And that’s where we’re at..

Yeah…

It’s tough.

I’m tougher than “it”

And I’m also tougher than you..

So I’ll be alright..

And I try to make connections on what matters, and brains and heart ..

Kindness.

Openness..

And I’ll never be a father and in a way I’m glad…

I would not want to pass any of this on….

Absolutely not

I would feel so guilty..

To see my child show signs of any of this ..

What drag…it’s a bummer..

So..

I do drugs.

And I hide.

Hide…

Hat low, concealed face..

Yeah..

I hide..and I don’t get close to people..

Because they’ll hurt you.

Because that’s what they do .

I even use that knowledge to predict hateful behavior.. because they’re hateful..

(ammo ).

Yeah…

A lot of their art sucks, so I can hurt feelings too ..if I have to..

But I’d rather not, I wish it wasn’t like it is …

And I wish y’all weren’t such a fucking joke ..

And you’re jokes raising jokes of children…

So..

Round and round we go..

Over and over..

Plowing through the centuries..

(geez )

Yeah man..it sucks..

(sucks being right)

Yeah..I wish I wasn’t..

(Wish you were clean….)

Yes.

I do…

I do.

I do.