And I went to grab one.
And I thought about him lying in that hospital bed, thought about watching his upper section convulse as the machine breathes for him.
“His lungs are gone”
“and his heart”
So if I open my pack,and I look at the cigarettes..
I see him, in that bed. Mouth forced open by apparatus …
(This is what I wanted, this is why I stared at him so long)
You wanted to infect my habit…
(I did)
(I wanted you to associate that act with this)
But I want a cigarette.
(That’s fine, have one. But don’t you dare forget this memory… I hope it eats at you when you go to light up…)
Jesus fuck….
Can I have a nicotine pack?
(do what you want ,fool. Do whatever you want)
But end up there….
(do you flirt with death, or do you truly want to stick your dick in her?)
Jesus fuck..
(do what you want, wanderer..)
……
dawn 