dawn

Never drunk enough to not hold it down, but still very drunk..

I liked it.

But it’s bad for you and I’m not stupid enough to ignore that…

Which is a drag?

Coulda stayed drunk..

Could have..

It’s no way to be, though.

Freeing?

Briefly..

But like everything else, it becomes a crutch, a denial of what’s right in front of you..

So fuck it.

This person,she tells me,

“I took an edible and balled my heart out”

She goes on to explain that she cried for the right now, the natural metamorphosis of time.

Your caterpillar is dead forever..

So I think back…

I cried for the future death of my cat, my mom,, cry for everything “ahead”,

Rarely feel what’s right now and even more rarely put eyes on the past.

Then,now,later.

That’s all there is..

Later is scary.

Then you’re glad to be away from.

Now is…now is not real.

Because I put so much work into avoiding it …

Distraction contraptions…

Hmm… Things to think about…

I do enjoy thinking.

Sober,drunk or high.

I do.

My testicles are throbbing today…let’s talk about our changing bodies!

Whoooooo