dawn

If I knew that being quiet would help me, I would do it.

Also, That is the majority of what I am in real life.

Listening.

Much more than speaking..

So if the world were to cut my tongue out, I would type.

If they chopped off my hands, I would use my feet.

If they took my feet, I would put a pencil in my mouth and scribble.

It’s not a sin to feel.

Or to think.

Or to say inflammatory things to yourself.

You have that superpower as long as you are alive..

And if a person really plays for themselves, and they really mean it,

You’ll never hear.

You’ll never notice.

Sling blasphemy against any structure standing, drop bombs and punish them if you must.

Dare ya to have a few real chats with yourself.

Do some pacing and thinking.

Something odd .

I know my biological father does that, He paces around and thinks.

At least he was 25 years ago..

So it’s genetic.

I have observed physical evidence that it is a genetic trait.

Follow the thought..

Neuroticism is a genetic trait, And there’s a sliding scale.

Like everything else.

Not an on/off switch, but a series of dimmers.

“little bit of this, little bit of that”

And that’s the reason that reproduction seems so overwhelming to me.

It’s not about sacrifice, or work, or guidance, or unconditional love.

It is the ingredients tossed into that dish, often carelessly.

You are doing the highest level of chemistry possible.

Maybe you can learn to look at people as a fruit tree.

Zoom out.

“oh this is delicious, look how pretty that one is ! Check out the colors!”

I haven’t met anyone that does that.

Sex feels good, roll the dice 🎲

Evolution will take care of the rest.

A long timeline and a predictable, unpredictable outcome.

I could leave all this bullshit in my head.

I mostly do .

I could just leave it.

But that’s all you’ve ever done, and you’ve been raised to be quiet 🤫

So you look around, you notice everyone talking.

Chatter chatter chatter.

Most are garbage, a few are skilled,,

And they’re going at it.

Yap yap yap.

They could be quiet too.

Just saying 😉.

They could figure some stuff out too.

Just saying.

Every person’s world doesn’t have to be so grand, so large.

They don’t have to carry that pressure..

They can go, and listen to Alan Watts talking about “The art of not forcing”

He says that being quiet is a part of the process.

And I like him.

And I respect him

And I envy his methods of articulation..

So …

So.

Doesn’t have to be the way you think it does.

And stop believing what you hear , because there’s liars out there.

And they profit off your attention.

That should make your head explode.

But it doesn’t.

Because we’re used to it.

Normalized.