dawn

I absolutely hate it.

I hate being in reality.

I hate being clear eyed and looking at it.

I hate it’s inhabitants, I hate how they behave and I hate how I respond.

Quicksand.

Every move is a trap and you can’t stop thinking about how ppl move.

Deep breath.

I’ll take what is control for $300.

I know the score.

Probably the shittiest part, the glaring fact that you have to feel shitty. You’re supposed to, they want you to.. supposed to feel reeeeeal shitty.

None of that matters.

You should feel shitty if just you, if it’s just you and the shitty, you should feel that shit.

Ughh.

The Brain is a nightmare,

it was a nightmare well before intoxicants.

Medicine.

So you sit with no medicine.

(What kind of God,, what kind of God would make this?)

” a complicated one”

(Touché)

So let’s say there is,

The brain, the human Brain,,a wildcard.

A random generator.

I can think of no other creature that does what our Brain does. Maybe whales.

So God built a body, an evolved reptile, then he opened the head and threw in a pair of dice..

I hate it.

I think it was an irresponsible creation.

I would not have advised anyone to make the kind of thing that we are…

Hate em…

Brain does not,shut,the,fuck,up.

Cept drugs.

But you can’t do drugs, because people nod off in hot tubs, guitar gods choke on their own vomit.

Can’t do em forever..

So your body revolts.. the mind nugget tied to it. Working in tandem,kicking your dick..

Dry desert veins, wrecked nervous system.

And you can feel every gram of sugar you take in , lick of salt, bolt of coffee, puff of tobacco.

Manic.

Thought machine cranking to nowhere, round and round..

It’s alright.

It’s no new thing.

I’m aware.

This shit is difficult, and I got nobody to whine to.

I know.

Completely Justified.

And I will talk to the internet, if I feel like it.

I got nowhere else for it.

And that’s it.

On principle.

You continue on principle.

Cause fuck em, don’t let the world get you down.