mehhhhhhh
so….
if you were in my position….
Mmmmm.
I’ll be real, and yes I drank, so start the clock over…
Look.
fuck,..,..,mnn9buyftyrdcjmvjk,bnlj m
I can hang around and watch my mother choose death. I can watch her do what her blood tells her to do,, or I can bounce. I have the money.
If I bounce, and start a little life and try to stake a little claim, I’ll know, in my fucking heart, that she’ll be here doing it to herself alone.
Like, I know what that feels like and it’s fucking dark. Brutal shit,, it really is. I’m not you, you’re not me, but that’s the story over here.
live your life and let someone wither , or pause a few years and try to be there.
it’s a mother fucker and I hate you and I hate every goddamn day that I have to wake up to it,, but still… that’s my shit. Every day.
I’m cold, but I’m not that cold. But also, this chick’s bloodline refuses to die.Decades now. Booze at 3, passed out by 7. Every cocksucking mother fucking day. Every goddamn one of them. Drunk by 7.
Barbara is too smart, she knows disconnection, I am not. I can kill the entire world but not her. Time can only kill her. And I’m fated to be front fuckin row. To watch the car crash in slow motion.
That’s why I’m here.
maybe i’ll type about it some more
dawn 