What if the Doc writes a script and it makes me worse?
What if I go full blown manic?
What if I have an epiphany , and I realize how ridiculous typing is, and I decide to go silent?
What if it kills the side of me that carries on?
(Impossible..)
What if I get locked into a stronger shift?
What if I’m not able to balance?
The mind is everything.
And the chemical relationships of the mind completely define who we are.
(Debatable)
I’m nervous about it.
Nervous, worried, stressed, fretting.
Fighting eternal darkness and the wage cage lead me to a place where I needed to put daily chemicals into my brain.
(Hey dummy, you were born that way, peep the family tree..)
WHAT IF IT GETS WORSE??
(It can’t. Look at you. It can’t)
What if I flinch?
(I won’t let you)
What if you’re gone? Or what if I can’t hear you? What if it’s just me and I truly am alone?
(Look, be honest with the Doc, not too honest, try what’s offered and keep a super close eye on your moods. You’ll be fine)
But what if I’m not?
(What if an asteroid crashes into the Earth man? It’s the wrong line of thinking, you’re getting caught up in a fear based thought process…think of how much shit you talk about people that live in a fear based mindset)
Yeah… I kinda do.
(That’s right you do! Because it’s stupid. It’s a stupid way to exist)
It is…
(Need a new chapter hoss. Now, you can keep dosing kratom extract at thirty dollars a day, or you can talk to someone and get an FDA approved mindfucker pill… covered by your insurance)
Yeah…
You’re right,, the path is clear..
I’m just worried.
(Don’t be. We got this)
Yeah… yeah we do..
Sometimes I’m really glad that I have this place.
(Yeah, me too)
Alright then.
Onward.
dawn 