All of my old music tastes, that came from step-dad. Even through Pentecostal shit, that came from step-dad. He buried his roots to side with my mother’s ideological religious values.
The Beatles, Led Zeppelin,Pink Floyd, Emerson Lake and Palmer. Ahh yes.. a failed bass player from New Orleans.
A therapist once told me, that I only became immersed in music as a subconscious way to speak to him..”I have value”
Mmmm…. Maybe. Or maybe I just fucking love music.
She said “no,no, that was your heart.Trying to show him that you had value, because you could appreciate the art form that he appreciated “.
Ok bitch.
It felt like she was downplaying how much I dig music.
“fuck you,smart bitch”
You’re going to tell me that I only put in the hours to subconsciously scream at him?
Look here ,chick,you don’t know how many hours I put in. You don’t know how much that emotional math means to me… You don’t fucking know.
Still, she stood her ground.
“you only loved that because he loved that” it was your inner child trying to say “I’m good, I matter”
Could never get on board with that.
Psychobabble
dawn 