dawn

I need to get my heart rate up.

I can’t see.

I’m only getting two or three hours of real sleep.

So I wake up with these bloodshot eyes.

Blood, shot, eyes, got ,me into trouble.

In previous scenarios.

I need my eyes to work

🥱.

Listening to true crime, listening to monsters etc etc.

There’s something that they have, something I never will,and I’m grateful I don’t.

Desire.

I guess that’s it.

Desire for harm, desire to kill.

Evil .

The bad seed.

You can tell I don’t have that , because if i did ?

You’d never know about it.

There would be no diarrhea diary.

There would be no outlet of openness or insanity.

No..

I would guard it like my life depended on it.

You would never know 👍👍

But I’m not evil, and I don’t have that thing,..

I have all the other things, but not that one.

Tilting a mere inch into “good”.

And it’s good enough.

Good enough to know.