dawn

I was trying to remember which Bible character God made eat shit. Literally.

As a test to faith, this human was told to eat feces with his food. The plan was originally for the character to eat human feces, but God determined that to be a bit sadistic, so He changed it to cow shit.

What a fun book.

Which character was that? In the Old Testament?

I don’t remember…..

The place I’m going to start hunting is existing contracts, go through the contacts already established. Instead of dropping flyers out of a plane. Go through the Digital Rolodex of business relationships already formed.

I will keep it in my mind, “not a beg”

Offer a service, a required service, under the underpinning of honorable transaction. This is not a push, not a press, not a game. I get to remain calm because life continues whether a purchase is made or not.

I’m also going to utilize Grammarly , maybe I’ll apply to the diary. I recognize that my command of language is lacking. You can keep a competent presentation without being a fucking dork. And there’s a level of detachment..

No person could ever guess what goes on behind the surface.I’d assume that most people with real issues develop very strong masks, outward personas.

I’m no different.

I’m nothing like I type.

This cycle is reaching it’s turn. For this current process,I think the worst is behind us, until the next rotation.

Manic depressives can’t take SSRI”s, learned that in the very beginning, it can trigger uhh,, triggers something. A bit of crazy. We’re supposed to take something called “mood stabilizers” , a very different thing and it takes 30 days minimum for psychotropic medication to have affect.

Maybe I could view it as an adventure.

Instead of being sad that it wrecks my creativity, I could understand that I’m playing around with brain chemistry, and I could embrace that and try to think up something new, like my favorite part of street drugs. Drugs in general.

I like the whacky places. No interest in eating shit though. Know where to draw your line with a higher power.

got a week no booze, probably too frequent THC usage,but not terrible. I can do 2. I mean fuck, anyone should be able to knock out a single sober month. Real talk. I get weird around day 9. If this happens to you? it’s probably time to ask yourself some real questions. Without being a drag about it. Logic is logic. Can’t argue or mock it.